Chapter Sixteen: Jerry’s Decision
So I got a letter in the mail from the U.S. Government. It appeared to be a form letter, so I’m thinking the same threat was sent to many other people, too.
In essence, they told me that they stored my body scan image after my recent airline travel adventure. And they said that they are going to release copies of it to the media if I don’t pay them $10,000 in “assessed fees.” Of course, I ain’t paying. This is just a preemptive strike. Here is the scan that they claim is me.
So, to all my friends and acquaintances, I SWEAR that ain’t me. My junk might be small average above average but I swear, that ain’t me!! My junk is so huge that can’t possibly be me! Really.
p.s. Mebbe that’s Lipton, but that ain’t me! Mike, is that you?!
I get sooooo tired of the libertarian wing of our fragile “fiscally conservative” coalition always whiiiiining about how social conservatives are the ones pressing the “hot button” social issues to rally their base. I get so tired of them whining that we should just ignore social issues that are divisive and concentrate on the important fiscal issues that are destroying our country.
Here’s some news for you if you are one of those whiners: The so-cons did not start the fight out in California over same-sex marriage, the liberals and/or libertarians did. When they lost at the ballot box, first they demonized those who opposed them, and when that failed, they filed suit in federal court. A queer judge ruled in their favor–go figure. Now the fight is on to get his queer ruling over-turned.
Meanwhile, the libertarians would have us just roll over and allow same-sex marriage to be jammed down our throats, against the will of the people. I for one am sick and tired of the libertarians wanting our help on fiscal issues and then stabbing us in the back on social issues.
Here, I know you selfish bastards only care about yourself, so I’ll put it in terms that even you respect. Opposition to same-sex marriage is a winning issue. You are on the wrong side of it. everywhere that it has been put to a vote, it has been defeated. And the populace is getting tired of having it jammed down their throats against their will by un-elected judges.
You’ve got the great weight of history against same-sex marriages. You’ve got biology. You’ve got the great moral thinkers throughout the ages. Then you’ve got flaming queers parading down the streets in rainbow T-shirts and boa feathers on your side. Look around. Sometimes it is instructive to see who are on your side. The same people who want to confiscate your hard earnings and have government-run your lives are also telling you that you must re-define “marriage” to suit their latest whims. Wake the f#ck up! You are on the wrong side.