I was set to be in court all day today. I was going to have to work all day yesterday, and late into the night, then get up after 4-5 hours sleep and work like mad in order to get ready and to the Court by 10:00 a.m. In short, I had a terrible few hours ahead of me. Then I got The Call.
At 9:00 a.m. yesterday the judge’s clerk called to inform us that two trials were scheduled and unless one settled, one would not be tried tomorrow. And he would not say which one. This is standard to put pressure on the litigants so that hopefully they will settle their case, or at least one set of litigants would agree to continue their case. Two minutes later the defense attorney called to see if I wanted to continue the case. We worked out a hi-low agreement. They pay us $25k now, and when we go to court later the most we can get is $90k. Even if the jury awards less than $25k, we get to keep that, and any award between $25k and $90k, we get that less the $25k already paid.
Pretty sweet deal. It’s just the same as “free-rolling” in poker. You get the $25k, and you have a free chance to win more, maybe much, much more. I jumped at it. Case is continued for three months.
But my purpose in writing this is to try to convey how ecstatic the continuance made me feel. I hate preparing for trial. Loathe it. I’m a “procrastinator” so I always have more to do than I can possibly get done in the remaining time. So all life ceases. And the pressure just starts building and building as I curse myself for not preparing earlier, for not doing this and for forgetting to do that. I kick myself and wonder why I ever decided to be a lawyer. Did I mention that I hate it?
Then the case got continued. I actually ran around skipping and singing, shouting and waving my arms.
Yesssss! My procrastination finally paid off. I didn’t waste all that time preparing for a case that would not be going to trial. What a genius. I suddenly had all this spare time. Why not start drinking early? Why not screw around? The sky actually looks bluer after a case is settled or continued. I’m friendlier to strangers. I love everybody in general and life in particular.
The only times I love being a lawyer is when a case is settled or continued, or after a hard-fought win. Well, and the times when I can just not do a damn thing because I am my own boss, and I don’t have to slave all night when I don’t have any urgent business to attend. So here it is, 3:00 p.m. my time on the day that I would have been in trial all day. Instead I slept in, played around, sat on my ass surfing the net, and got absolutely no business taken care of all day long. Am I sorry? Not in the least. Why do today what I can put off until tomorrow? I hereby decree that today’s “happy hour” starts two hours earlier and might even be extended by a couple or three hours!
Cheers, John Doe.