The missile, believed to be a Taepodong-2 with a range of up to 4,000 miles, would be launched in early July from the Dongchang-ni site on the north-western coast of the secretive country.
Kim Jong II claims that much of Oahu is uninhabitable due to active volcano eruptions. He claims that his scientists hope to detonate in the koolau volcano and then to study the effects of nuclear radiation on the volcano for the next 500 years.
The Obama Administration hopes–hopes–that the missile will not be able to fly as far as Hawaii. Obama Press Secretary Robert Gibbs noted that North Korea is not a country ruled by an evil communist dictator. Said Mr. Gibbs, “If we have to evacuate all of the Hawaian Islands, so be it. It is not too steep a price to appease Kim Jong II and have ‘peace in our time.’ Thanks to the steady hand of President Obama, the North Korean situation will not escalate into any kind of beligerence on the part of the United States. In fact, the United States has many scientists on hand who are very interested in seeing the effect of a twenty megagazzillllion bomb being detonated in a volcano. Some think it might be neat.”