The different degrees of Republicans explained, and where they go wrong

Degree of Republican Number One:

What I Call Them: Cop-outs. (also acceptable: ex-hippies, who grew up, became conservative, stopped smoking dope but retained the cop-out attitude. Or they are religious, in which case they are Amish, Monks, Nuns, etc.)  You will have to read to the end of this article to understand why they cop out.
What They Cannot Understand: Government is not perfect, because neither is society, but that is the very reason that good people have to be involved. If all the good people cop-out to avoid being polluted–or disappointed–by politics, only the bad (or misinformed) people will be left to run the government. They are natural Republican allies, but not of much use.
What They Want to Prove About Themselves: They are in the world, not of it. They are not polluted by the culture, “The Man”, the philosophy or the modernity of society.
How to Spot Them: They are non-political. They do not vote. They are uninformed about politics, and they take pride in that fact. They also wear funny clothes. It is good to know that they are out there, but they are not of much use to The Cause.
Where They Go Astray: Good intentions sometimes are not enough. You can indeed be too heavenly-minded to be any earthly good.

 

Degree of Republican Number Two:

What I Call Them: My Daddy was a Republican (Or my Hubby). (You also see a lot of Christians who have this attitude: My Family was Christian, so I am too). 
What They Cannot Understand: It really is necessary to think for yourself and to adopt beliefs in which you, yourself really believe.
What They Want to Prove About Themselves: That they hold to the same philosophy/faith that their Daddy/Hubby/Church taught.                                                                                                                          Where They Go Astray: God gave you a brain—use it! And if you do not know enough about a topic, it is acceptable to say that you have not yet come to a conclusion on that particular issue. Then go out and edgeumakate educate yourself about that issue. Do not just parrot the conclusion of Daddy/Hubby/Church. 

 

Degree of Republican Number Three:

What I Call Them: Libertarians. 
What They Cannot Understand: They confuse “Liberty” with “Licentiousness.” Society devolves into chaos without certain rules and regulations. They don’t call it “civilization” for nothing.                                                                                 What They Want to Prove About Themselves:    That they are so open-minded that anything that consenting adults do in private is fine by them. [Yeah, and most of libertarians smoke dope.]                              Where They Go Astray: “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” They forget what made America great. Strong work ethic. Family values. Morals. And they buy into the liberal godless heathen belief that The Constitution forbids legislation based upon morals and beliefs based solely upon The Bible.  This would shock the Founding Fathers who wrote The Declaration, The Constitution and The Bill of Rights. Besides, there were good reasons besides just morals and The Bible why our Forefathers put certain restrictions on behavior. Society “works” better if sex is confined within marriage of a man and a woman. Society “works” better if people are not left to do whatever they want, when they want it. Societies devolve to the lowest common denominator. Fast.  And once a society devolves to the point where anything goes, anything goes.  Bullfights? Check. Chariot races and Gladiators? Check. Burn Christians at the stake? Double check.   Humans are animals? Check. Abortion? Check. Holocaust? Double check. These people are smart enough to realize that economic conservative is best because it works, but not quite smart enough to realize that social conservatism works because it, too, “works.”

Bring back SHAME

There was a reason women were called sluts. There was a reason, even if it was misguided, why adultresses were labeled with a crimson letter A. Single parenthood bad, mother and father parenthood good. Now they are openly admired.  See photo to left.  I know it is politically incorrect and will further inflame every liberal’s belief that I am a racist, but African American women need to be shamed. Too many are stupid. (I know, I know, many whiteys and yellows and browns need to be shamed as much or more.) But for crying out loud, the rate of black African-American unwed motherhood is as out of control as Bill Clinton amongst a gaggle of interns. So I’ll direct this at black women, just to piss off liberals, but realize this is directed at all women. Just don’t tell the liberals. I enjoy pissing them off. 😉

My take on President Obama: Give the Devil his due.

Olbermann gives Obama "intense scrutiny"

I despise the man. I despise how he lied, out-right lied, every chance he got in order to get elected. I hate his political philosophy, his ears, his racism, his pandering, even his sissy way of speaking  (anybody else notice how he hisses when words end with the letter S? warsssss.  carssssss. toyssss.).  I hated him for his campaign promises when he made them, because I believed that every one of them was made in a calculated attempt to get elected. Not because he believed them, but because he was opportunistic enough and manipulative enough to get away with saying and doing anything in order to win. And I hate him for the campaign promises that he has kept. And I hate him for the way his particular brand of bull shit was so effective in rallying the  frothing at the mouth liberal anti-American godless heathens that are the Democratic base.

But I’ll give the Devil his due. Some of the promises that he is breaking, or at least moving towards breaking, mean he at least is somewhat responsible when it comes to foreign affairs. He has stepped up attacks by drones over Pakistan.  He hasn’t rushed to release all the prisoners in Guantanimo (yet).  I know that these are precisely the same reasons that give his aforementioned base the most concern about his new Presidency. Maybe that is why I mention it here.  But the rest of his Presidency has been an absolute disaster. I can’t wait until 2012. And did I mention that I hate President Obama?

An Ode to John Edwards

“Little johnnie edwards
Couldn’t keep it in his pants
made a little baby
With his little tiny slant

“Little tiny liberals
Loved that rascal John
hate the little baby
Made by the tiny coiffed don Juan

“Saintly zaftig Elizabeth
Never had a clue
John is off again with the blondie
Whats a wife to do?

“The press toiled most nobly
To cover up the facts
Cover up the baby
Cover up his tracks

“But out damn spot
The truth will out
And the tale will oft be told
How little Johnnie Edwards
Left his country out in the cold.”

By somebody called “Plantagenet” in the comments section of a very good article in The Daily Beast.

Jesse Ventura on waterboarding: Smash Mouth Politics bitch slaps him

It doesn’t work, he whines. It works too well, he whines. If it works so well, why don’t we allow it in jails? And why do we only do it to Muslims, he asks in his gruffest whiney voice. And the liberal girly-men are having multiple orgasms over him–a real manly man–siding with them on the issue of torture. (It’s so rare for any manly man to agree with liberals that they can’t help themselves.)  Can’t you just hear the ecstacy in his writing as one liberal oohs and aaahs over Jesse’s recent comments? From a recent article from The Daily Beast by an apparent full-fledged girly-man:

“Watching Ventura cut through the cable chatter like a rusty bayonet [ooooooh!] has been thrilling [aaaaah!]. ‘You give me a waterboard, Dick Cheney, and one hour, and I’ll have him confess to the Sharon Tate murders [ooooooh!],’ Ventura told Larry King last week, adding an exclamation point to his contention that torture produced unreliable intelligence [aaaaaah!].”

Colin Powell defines what it is to be a Republican

Belief in certain principals? Nah. Conviction on a certain core set of issues that are non-negotiable? No way, Jose’. How does Mr. Powell “prove” he is a Republican? He spoke at two Republican Conventions! He worked for “ten years of his life” in Republican Administrations! Wooo hoooo! That settles it in my mind. He can vote Democrat. He can publicly endorse a Democrat for President. It’s all good. He worked for Republican Presidents! He gave a speech!

Hillary Clinton: unfair to treat Diplomats’ Hookers differently than their wives

Associated Perversion May 24, 2009: Hillary Clinton, that final arbiter of “fairness,” has decided that the hookers and gigolos of hetersexual U.S. Diplomats should receive the same benefits as do the wives or  husbands of such Diplomats. Treating hookers and gigolos, or just girlfriends and boyfriends, of such Diplomats differently than the wives or husbands of such Diplomats is “unfair and must end,” as they harm U.S. diplomacy. Ms. Clinton claimed that disparate treatment “harmed” U.S. diplomacy as it might cause perverts to quit in protest that their hookers and gigolos do not receive the same benefits as their spouses.  Or never to join the diplomacy effort to begin with.