Carbon Offsets For Sale Here

Due to popular demand, we have expanded our offerings to include package deals:

Our “Ginormous Offsets Deal“–For ONLY $1,000 for a full year, you too can live guilt free. And for those of you who can’t resist a deal, we offer a full ten years of guilt free living, all for the low, low price of $8,299.99 (financing available).  (1)

Our “Struggling Student Deal”–For ONLY $250 for a full semester, you can impress that Vegan Obamaniac hot chick who doesn’t shave her pits and who sits two rows over from you in “Men Are All Pigs” 301. This is your only chance to impress her, you metro-sexual hottie you! (If she’s not butch.)

And finally, our “Al Gore Deluxe Super Duper Deal”–this is for you typical liberals out there who believe everything that famous scientist Al Gore tells you. But, you just hate to assauge your guilt with your own money–you prefer to pay with Other People’s Money! For only $29.95 of your own money, you can live guilt free. FOREVER!  (2)

SOME reasons why I am a “Strict Constructionist”

 

THIS is an example of how the people who “interpret” the Bill of Rights have completely changed the original meaning of the words:

Amendment I

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion Which even allows any mention of religion by the Government, or allows any public displays of crosses or Creeches, or any praying or bible study, UNLESS WE SAY SO, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech McCain-Feingold baby!  or of the press [Hey, we liberals like the press, let's keep this one in there] ; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

 

Amendment II

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.  [Oh yes the right to bear arms shall be infringed for decades. OOOOOPS! Mebbe not, see District of Columbia v. Heller, 2008.]

SUDDENLY liberals are concerned about “Respect for the Office of the Presidency”?

After years of “Buck Fush” and “Somewhere in Texas a village has lost an idiot”, suddenly they want the Pubs to respect the Office now that Nobama is aboard. The object of their sudden concern? A little song which parodies Al Sharpton’s jealousy of Obama’s rise from nowhere without paying his dues.  What is so ironic is that the co-writer of the original song, Puff the Magic Dragon, is a convicted child molester, yet he condemns the Shanklin parody as a  it “insults the office of the Presidency.”   *

WHAT THE HELL is wrong with whoever runs “RightyBlogs Virginia”? “The Valley Progress Report” is about as left as you can get without falling off the face of the earth

If that communist ungodly heathen faggot loving imbecile has a “RightyBlog”, then I’m the King of Russia. Fine, if that dumb bastard wants to blog, let him. But don’t let him call himself a RightyBlog. He is just gaming the system, playing you for a fool. My suggestion: kick him off of RightyBlogs and put him where he belongs: CommieBlogs Virginia.

Another instant classic at iowahawk

Here is just a little taste of a “guest opinion” by Princess Caroline’s housekeeper on why the Princess should be selected Senator:

“Senora Kennedy she is from famous senator family. Senora Kennedy father was El Presidente. She have tio who is senator. She have many cousin who also is senator, even all the ones with the drug problems. Why she is only one who no is senator? This is no fair to her. In my old country was the law that all family of el Presidente is also Senator or Minister until the revolucion….

Is Michael Steele the GOP’s next token black?

Looky at us! We got a black man too! The teams in the NFL are infamous for copy-catting whatever worked for the team that won the Super Bowl the year before. 3-4 defense won? Teams rush to implement the 3-4.  Smash mouth football won? (he he, shameless plug.) Teams rush to get rid of their wide open offense and draft the next John Riggins. Now, I know nothing about any of the prospective GOP leaders. I’m just hoping that the GOP is not choosing any of them based upon the color of their skin. First, even if a black man such as Blackwell or Steele is selected, he won’t be given credit by blacks and the media and Democrats–he’ll just be a token Uncle Tom. The GOP could do anything in the world and still never get more than 5-10% of the lock-step minority that is the black population in America. Second, I thought the GOP was supposed to judge people by the content of their character? So, my standard would be, let the best man or woman be chosen, and let the chips fall where they may. And that better damn well be the standard the GOP uses. If they want this honky’s vote.

Obama jokes

What’s the difference between Obama and the Messiah? Not all liberals worship the Messiah.

“The only awkward moment was when Bush complimented Obama on his campaign. He said, ‘You did a heck of a job, Brownie.’” –Jimmy Kimmel